Top 10: Worst Movies I Watched for My 2014 Challenge

After all the awesomeness of my movie challenge, here is the crap pile. I really saw some shitty movies. This is list is also a warning for you, to never watch them. EVER!

10. The Counselor

It’s not the actors, or the director. This movie just didn’t make any sense. Thinking of it now, I don’t even remember what this movie was about. I do remember Cameron Diaz making love to a windshield. I wish I didn’t.

 

 

9. Bachelorette It wanted to be like “Bridesmaids”. It did provoke, but not in a good way. I felt ashamed of those people.

 

 

8. Abduction

“Abduction” was clearly about showing Taylor Lautner’s abs as many times as possible. And a constantly out of breath Lily Collins. No, I wish they would abduct this movie so it will never bother anyone ever again.

 

 

7. The Host

Author Stephanie Meyer really didn’t do it with “The Host”. I don’t know if it’s worse than “Twilight”, because it’s pretty much the same story with some alterations here and there.

 

 

6. Empire State

An unbelievable true story, about a heist of very badly protected money. This story is perfect source material for a good crime thriller. Instead I actually fell asleep halfway through the film. I dozed off for a couple of minutes. That’s never a good sign.

 

 

5. Dark Tide

For a shark movie, there aren’t a lot of sharks in it. It’s just Halle Berry in a bikini talking about her trauma, when she saw her friend get killed by a shark. Please skip this one.

 

 

4. Paranoia

You would think that Harisson Ford, Gary Oldman and talented Liam Hemsworth would make this work. Think again. It’s not any good and it lacks originality.

 

 

3. The Big Wedding

The director of “The Big Wedding” had Robert De Niro, Susan Sarandon, Diane Keaton ánd Robin Williams. And this is what he did with the movie!! You might as well send us a box of poop. This sucks, even Katherine Heigl thinks it sucks, because she looks grumpy the entire runtime of the film.

 

 

2. Battleship

NO, bad man Peter Berg, for making “Battleship”! It’s so stupid, everything about is stupid. And Liam Neeson, why are you in this shitty film?

 

 

1. Scarecrow

I don’t think anyone knows this movie, which is a good thing. Please keep it that way. Oh, and for a movie about a killing scarecrow, it doesn’t even look like a scarecrow.

 

 

 

Dishonorable Mentions: The Watch, The Guilt Trip, What to Expect When You’re Expecting, Hoe Duur Was de Suiker, Gone, Devil’s Due, Something Borrowed

Movie Trailer Sunday (46)

This weeks trailers are about how actions have impact on live throughout the past, a man on a lifeboat with a Bengal tiger, corrupt cops, surfing and a bachelorette party.

Cloud Atlas
Description: "Cloud Atlas" explores how the actions and consequences of individual lives impact one another throughout the past, the present and the future. Action, mystery and romance weave dramatically through the story as one soul is shaped from a killer into a hero and a single act of kindness ripples across centuries to inspire a revolution in the distant future.
Director: Tom Tykwer, Andy Wachowski, Lana Wachowski
Starring: Tom Hanks, Halle Berry, Jim Broadbent, Hugo Weaving, Jim Sturgess, Susan Sarandon, Hugh Grant
Trailer: Trailer "Cloud Atlas"
Comment: I read the book last year and it really fascinated me because I never read anything like it before. This trailer looks fantastic and I really want to see this film!

Life of Pi
Description: A young man survives a tragic disaster at sea and is hurtled into an epic journey of adventure and discovery. While marooned on a lifeboat, he forms an amazing and unexpected connection with the ship's only other survivor - a fearsome Bengal tiger
Director: Ang Lee
Starring: Tobey Maguire, Suraj Sharma, Irffan Khan, Gerard Depardieu, Adil Hussain
Trailer: Trailer "Life of Pi"
Comment: Another movie based on a great novel. I haven't read it yet, but after seeing this trailer I think I will read it.

Freelancers
Description: The son of a slain NYPD officer joins the force, where he falls in with his father's former partner and a team of rogue cops. His new boss, Sarcone (Robert De Niro), will see if he has what it takes to be rogue through many trials and tribulations of loyalty, trust and respect. When the truth about his father's death is revealed, revenge takes over him, and he won't stop until justice has been truly served.
Director: Jesse Terrero
Starring: Robert De Niro, Forest Whitaker, Curtis "50 Cent" Jackson, Dana Delany
Trailer: Trailer "Freelancers"

Chasing Mavericks
Description: We follow a Jay Moriarty's (Leven Rambin) quest to surf Northern California's most dangerous wave, and the local legend (Gerard Butler) who takes him under his wing. What begins as a mentorship turns into a unique lifelong bond, as the two unlikely friends discover that there is nothing more powerful than pushing your limits and chasing a nearly impossible dream.
Director: Curtis Hanson
Starring: Gerard Butler, Elizabeth Shue, Leven Rambin, Abigail Spencer
Trailer: Trailer "Chasing Mavericks"

Bachelorette
Description: On the night before an old friend's wedding, three frisky bridesmaids go searching for a little fun but find much more than they bargained for. With lovely Becky (Rebel Wilson) set to marry her handsome sweetheart, Dale (Hayes MacArthur), the remaining members of her high school clique reunite for one last bachelorette bacchanal in the Big Apple. Regan (Kirsten Dunst) is an overachieving, ueber-Maid of Honor who's secretly smarting over the fact that she's not the first to marry, while Gena (Lizzy Caplan) is a whip-smart sarcastic who's actually a closet romantic, and Katie (Isla Fisher) is a ditzy beauty who loves the good life. But when Becky insists on keeping the bachelorette party tame, the women proceed with an after-hours celebration of their own.
Director: Leslye Headland
Starring: Kirsten Dunst, Lizzy Caplan, Isla Fisher, James Marsden, Adam Scott, Rebel Wilson, Hayes MacArthur
Trailer: Trailer "Bachelorette"
Comment: It looks a lot like "Bridesmaids", but I love Kirsten Dunst so...